everything that has a beginning

i feel “the end” coming. blogspot is fully searchable now. my little pseudo-anonymous stash for my thoughts can be easily found using my real name. i'm none to pleased about it. i have a blog that most people are likely to find... a blog that few people are likely to even check for... and then of course, a “you bet' not tell nobody but God... it'a kill yo mama”-type journal that nobody will ever find. as if anyone's really looking.

“gotta go to place where i can explode / where they don't ask me questions / where they don't even know my name / so i'm goin' to the underground” - bernadette cooper, “the underground”

the point is, i have to find some other place of freedom where who i am and what i think doesn't have to be influenced by the confines of who's looking, who may be upset, who'll misunderstand and then subsequently try to make my life difficult, and you know i don't want to have to cuss nobody out. lawd, please don't let nobody come up to my face trippin' 'cause they didn't like what i wrote in my blog.