every now and then i can see that i'm getting somewhere

in case you didn't know, i've been pulling double duty at my other blog across town. i've been cheating on my beloved blogspot with daily rendezvous at myspace. i'm still keeping this one as my quietly locked away "first-love" blog so that i can still be candid and maintain some anonymity when i need to.

so. the topic of the day... baby steps, baby steps, baby steps. i'm changing and i think i like it. i'm past 25 and it's not disasterous. i'm very much lovin' it. so check it out. wednesday night, by happenstance, i got into a cleaning mode and actually succeeded in clearing away enough junky bulk from my floors that i was able to... *gasp* vacuum it. if you walked into my living space, you might even think i was a neat freak. well, there's a method too my madness, but a neat freak i'm not. whatever. that was not the point.

and this isn't either. but it's necessary foundation. since the floor was cleared out, i actually had space to dance. normally, when there's so much junk on the floor that i only have space to rock gently from side to side. but now i can move and turn and jump and whatever i want. i had to bust out some old school TLC and cut myself a slice of rug in honor of them finally releasing their greatest hits album stateside. can't believe they've essentially come to an end, but the point is... that that's not the point either.

here's the blasted point. as i was jumping around and shaking my groove thing with abandon, i noticed in the mirror that my arms are beginning to look defined. if i didn't know better, i would swear i was grown folk. or close enough. i find this amazing. my work out regiment hasn't been rigorous or strenuous, but i can tell i'm becoming more fit. i went from those initial 3 push-ups that i thought were going to kill me, to doing a full set of 10 of them to doing multiple sets of 15. a friend of mine has me randomly going jogging with him 2 to 3 times a week late at night when the california heat doesn't mercilessly oppress the innocent beings beneath it.

plus, another friend of mine was telling me about dips: the exercise where you lower and raise your full body weight just using the strength in your arms and upper body. well, when he explained the concept, it sounded great on paper. i tried to do one, and all i could manage was lowering my full body weight. raising it just wasn't gonna happen that day. so he chimed in, that i may have to help myself up with my feet when first starting off. well, that's exactly what had to happen for a couple weeks. but lo and behold... *drum roll* one day... *drum roll continues* i completed... *interjecting an american idol sized amount of unnecessary suspense* without any help from lower extremities, a full dip. *gasp in amazement, pause, and cue applause*

yeah, me, the once consummately frail bean pole, did a single dip, lowered and raised. all by myself. clap for me and put my picture on the refrigerator. it's wonderful... marvelous. you should care for me. i'm downplaying it, because i'm sure somebody reading this has massive arnold schwarzenegger arms and is laughing a hearty laugh at me, maybe even with a derisive austrian accent. but freak that! this is BIG for me! it's momentous! i did a dip. i was so happy, i had to call my erstwhile trainer immediately after in the middle of the night and tell him about it. fortunately, he's nocturnal like me, so his enthusiasm for my progress wasn't mitigated by the fact that i was calling around 12 o'clock at night.

i'm glad though. now has got to be the time to establish the physique i wanna keep, 'cause i've heard that the body you have at 30 is about the one you have for the rest of your life. sounds like urban legend, but if there is any validity to it, i'll be ready for it at this rate.

“every now and then i can see that i'm getting somewhere, where i have to go is so deep.” - jennifer knapp, “diamond in the rough”